Shift Movement

We’re in the business of supporting each other to accelerate a shift in consciousness. This process inevitably engenders the occasional healing crisis and breakthrough. Let me share one of mine.

Last week on Thursday I started to get severe pain in my lower back. I also had an intense shivering fit. I felt as if I was on the North Pole. I decided to go to bed early and put on the electric blanket. As I was lying there I was thinking, well, I’m in the self-healing business, what’s this all about? I tested that the underlying cause was emotional. I thought, possibly anger or fear. Fear tested strong. So fear of what? I tried various things, eventually, fear of SUCCESS. I would never have believed that!

But it did make sense. In the first 40 years of my life, I experienced success all the time. In the last 20 years, I have experienced failure and at best mediocre success. Certainly no breakthroughs. I was comfortable in not succeeding. Meanwhile, all the week we had been experiencing one success after another with Conscious Evolution Coaching. The feedback on all fronts was immensely positive and we were beginning to attract new participants into new programs. Suddenly it was looking as if this could really fly. It was all coming together. Success was staring me in the face. Ooooops!

So still in immense pain, I calibrated the intensity of the statement: “I have fear of success” at the level of 8 out of 10. The Truth Statement: “I wish it is safe for me to experience the success of Conscious Evolution Coaching” tested strong, so having centred myself, I started repeating it as a mantra. Before I fell asleep the negative statement was down to 5. When I woke it was 0. So, the fear of success had completely cleared. What remained was just a faint imprint of the lower back pain.

The previous two nights I had experienced two very powerful dreams, one related to abandonment in a strange city, the other I forget. Also, my prostate was playing up and I had to get up about 6 times each night. When I woke after doing the healing, my body was covered in a red rash, which stayed for two days. But my sleep improved and in the subsequent nights I only got up once.

So the self-healing worked, knowing also and trusting that I am supported by my group. Knowing also that my vulnerability is the source of my power.

Thanks and love, Michael

Bravo! And a skin rash is the best sign of an illness leaving the body (the skin being the lowest level of threat to the organism). I’m curious if you had a fever? When I first started my business I used to get a migraine at each new step toward success I took. I would plug along, migraine-in-head, and just go through it. Accepting success is HARD! Maybe as hard as forgiving – for me.

I cannot WAIT to start this program!

Thanks for sharing, Michael!

Many blessings,

Julie

I love that about vulnerability being the source of your power.  Its so true.  I have written about that, and like so much else it is so scary. And facing that is even scarier…which is what makes standing empowered in our vulnerability such a magnificent boddhisatva training.  It reminds me so much of Pema Chodron, don’t you think?  Great to read your posts.

Thanks so much for that sharing Michael.

It was like reading a mirror across the world.

No pains, cold or rashes here, but recent acceptance that I had some fear of success in certain aspects of my journey, as well as that of being misunderstood.

I had two dreams this morning. Both very clear. Then I read your story.

Figuratively speaking, I won’t be looking back. Awareness only moves us forward.

More healing to you and us all.

Mercie et amour

trev

Dear MIchael 

thank you for your beautiful open vulnerable sharing,so wonderful to see such transparency openness and trust ,this takes courageous and comes from a place of love strength and trust in universe god,self and humanity 

well done for being your own healer ,how powerful is that ,to come to such a understanding of self that you can understand be totally honest with self,take responsibility give yourself love and compassion and heal your self WOW!!! 

and yes you do have support of the group ,we are one !

I so resonate  with your statement about your vulnerability being source of your power ,this  is real power ,when we feel confident and safe enough to share our deepest self with others ,when there is no ego no need to protect our selves 

that we are all one and no matter what the circumstances or surface pattern playing out we all share the same human condition ,when we can come to really understand this in every cell of our body ,to really understand our selves to connect to god with this trust and deeper wisdom to become our own healers this is true evolution of our species 

much love and thanks for such a powerful sharing of true power and wisdom 

In Lak’ech 

Tracy 

Dear Michael,

thank you for sharing, for being so open and true….!!!!

One little hint to “words create reality”..how would it feel ? if you would not say “I WISH(wishing means not realized yet) it is safe for me to experience the success of Conscious Evolution.”….but feel first the fear and than the succes deeply and say “Although  right now my conditioned self doesn’t believe in succes yet,(means you are accepting what is, so resistance is not necessary) deep in myself I KNOW that succes is not only safe, it is also bringing joy for me and for others.(the word “others” is important because it relaxes from the impression you are doing it only for yourself). So in the affirmation is the acceptance of “what is” first and than there is the connection with the highest. Hope this is supporting. In systemic therapy we have been trained a lot in refraiming and how important it is to use the paradoxes. You surely know the sentence from Nelson Mandela where he says: “The greatest fear in us is not that for the dark, but that for the highest light in us”.So let us get lighter every day together. Big hug. Karine

Wow! I still have shivers from this deeply honest thread. Thank you Michael for your visionary strategy and plan, and most of all for modelling such transparency and self healing.  I love Karine´s awareness on wording our healing with precision.

Many blessings to everyone, Virginia

Thankyou Michael for sharing your experiences so openly as well how you interpreted it and helped yourself through it.Making yourself so vulnerable is definitely a sign of conscious evolution itself…

I am very interested in doing the CEC course but I am not too sure how to go about it. Please help.

Love and Smiles from Brisbane, Down Under

Carolyn

I am reading through the responses to Michael’s wonderful sharing and realizing again, that success, of course, brings responsibility. Coming into this program opens me up to many possibilities for learning and expanding, as well as success with all the responsibilities attached to that.

Michael, please let me shoulder some of your burden until Ellen returns. I have time, for now.

Julie

I am feeling my way into these pages – realising that I often internalise and that part of my own learning and evolution (and ours) is to get it out! Thank you for being here.

I have been in melt down/crises and evolving (if not breaking through!) for a couple of weeks now, in various forms – precipitated by being in this group, in this process, and particularly thanks to the perpetual practice and engagement required from day to day, moment to moment, as we move from one Thursday presentation to the next.  It peaked within me when we had Thursday, followed by Friday as the first presentation to ‘the wider group’ – for those interested in joining the CEC programme – already nearly 2 weeks ago on 6 July.  

I had been consciously and intently engaged and very at ease – often in this ‘zone’ all falls into place, often in the moment and it feels good (often enhanced by a Just in Time boost in energy/flow).  And yet in the few hours pre our Friday session, I froze and my computer froze (which then went on to be pronounced dead at the computer shop – mentioned that somewhere else in these posts since then).  I felt I had no voice, no energy, no nothing – yet somehow still managed to say something (even though I felt like jumping in the sea and going for a very long swim and perhaps never returning – that strong) – after the call, I was devastated, felt I would need to leave you, not continue …..

And I didn’t mention it, didn’t reach out to you my group, didn’t share it.  I had some extraordinary and fairly similar dreams where I was lost, excluded, hounded.  And gradually gone through our CeC process ….because there was nothing else I could do. 

Finally just saying it as I felt it  (to Michael – having had the opportunity to see him face to face this week, passing through the area) – without going into ‘the work’ of it at all, yet simply talking and somehow KNOWING that it was moving on/changing/shifting as we spoke (because it is shared and it is part of our whole – it has to be!) – has eased and is easing the deep pattern.  And as we talked and shared, it has become clear for me that I am sharing the Fear of Success – I knew it at some level and simply didn’t ‘get’ it at others – and that by us clearing in ourselves we are clearing in others, and in clearing in others, we are clearing in ourselves.  The very cycle we are co-creating in Conscious Evolution coaching.  And as he has cleared, so am I, and you and we all.

I am deeply moved by this vulnerability, and know too that it is a source of strength/power and evolution in action.  Thank you.

Now on with tomorrow’s presentation ..

With Peace and Love to you

Morag x

WOW Morag!  It’s good to recognize a shift.  How exhilerating success is!  Now future successes will come easily and effortlessly.  I look forward to your presentation.

Love & Light, Judy

Thank you! ooooooof. x And assisted by a fabulous, simple, easy, effortless (when you ‘get’ it – ah! like life then), fast (in the moment) up to date (and possibly beyond) computer.  WOW! Here we gooooooooooooo x

It would seem that this CEC process we are in is having a massive effect on us. Thank you so much Michael and Morag for sharing. I had been conflicted about sharing my recent experience and you’ve created a wonderful holding space for it – thank you.

A few days ago I was out on my bike and I ran over a young rabbit and killed it. I was horrified and cried out in anguish. It was about 7.30 in the morning and I was on a quiet country lane with no other traffic. The hedgerow came right up to the edge of the road and the rabbit just darted out right under my front wheel as if it had been waiting there for me to pass. There was no way I could not have avoided it.

When I had centred myself and made my peace with the rabbit, I started to think. In my way, this was a Medicine sign. What was so important that a rabbit would give its life for? What is it that Mother Life is trying to get my attention about that she has to resort to such drastic action?

I began to explore what I was thinking about when it happened. I was feeling bad about not connecting with a new guy, Andy, who’s recently joined the Philosophy Society I’m a part of. He’s loud, brash and takes too much airtime, and he’s on crutches having been bed bound for the last 10 years with a medical condition in his legs. I’m the one who challenges him when he talks for too long.

I suddenly realised I have more compassion for the rabbit than I do for Andy! I thought perhaps I was afraid of Andy but did some testing that I’d learned in CEC and discovered I am angry with him.

And I sense this is part of a much bigger issue for me. I have been contemplating the question ‘what does it take to see the other as part of myself?’ My head gets it but my heart doesn’t yet. And yet here I am talking ‘as if’ we are all connected, part of me knows deeply that we are.

The Healing Codes tell me that anger is related to ‘unforgiveness’ so I started to look for patterns and who I needed to forgive. I saw that I get angry whenever I sense that someone is trying to control me.

And I found the arch-controller – my mother! I am starting to remember/realise how she used emotional blackmail to get me to do what she wanted. I remember being very rebellious when I was young and blamed myself. I guess there also had to be something to rebel against.

So I am eternally grateful that the rabbit and Andy came into my life. And I will seek help from my PaL (peace and love) coach later today in crafting a Truth Statement that I can work with. I’m also happy to hear from anyone with ideas and help.

Love

Mike

Hi Mike, thanks for sharing.

Whenever I have anger issues like that, I usually find tha that I can clear them quite quickly by centring, being with the feeling and then processing it through Acceptance, Compassion (Contrition), Forgiveness and Unconditional Love. When these all test strong, the resistance caused by the anger has been neutralised and I am back in the flow.

My partner of 40 years, Jesssica, is currently unloading a heap of dung on my head as she goes off to work to earn our upkeep, while I “have my feet up at home” with no additional money coming in. Instead of giving loving support, it’s easier for her to project her fears and insecurity onto me. So that’s how I resolve the resistance, and by the time she gets home, it’s all sweetness and light. And I can continue to focus on what I’m doing without resentment.

Thanks and love, Michael

Thank you Michael. I will try the process you suggest and still sense a need to heal the source of the anger.

And I don’t believe a word of what you say about Jessica – she’s much too sweet for that!

Love

Mike